Are you a Patriot or a Pretender

We create and sell patriotic gear proudly made in the U.S.A

We understand how proud you are to be an American, but our society treats you like a villain if you try to display it. Every American has the right to express themselves; especially if they are expressing love for their country.

We understand the dirty looks you get when you wear your favorite patriotic shirt or hat in public. We understand feeling like a pretender when you cross your arms to hide the gun logo on your chest, just to spare Karen’s feelings.

Patriotic Americans shouldn’t have to feel like this. We are here to reinstall pride into patriotism.

Our apparel and merchandise will highlight the virtues and values that make America great. We will wear these designs proudly and we know Patriots like you will do the same.

More than ever, America needs her true Patriots to represent proudly. No more covering up your logo.It’s time to stop being a pretender and start being a patriot.

Without you, America dies

Check it Out

WHAT WE BELIEVE.

Want liberals making choices for you? Yeah, we don't either! You can get a cool product, support our mission, and help us beat the libs all at the same time.

  • WAP WRONG ASS PRESIDENT Unisex Classic T-Shirt
    WAP WRONG ASS PRESIDENT Unisex Classic T-Shirt - khaki
    Regular price
    $15.00
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    $15.00
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  • Patriotic Women’s Tri-Blend Racerback Tank Top
    Patriotic Women’s Tri-Blend Racerback Tank Top - heather dusty rose
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    $21.00
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    $21.00
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  • Patriotic American Eagle Flad Men’s Moisture Wicking Performance T-Shirt
    Patriotic American Eagle Flad Men’s Moisture Wicking Performance T-Shirt - white
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    $22.00
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    $22.00
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  • 13 Colonies 1776 Patriotic American Men's Premium T-Shirt
    13 Colonies 1776 Patriotic American Men's Premium T-Shirt - black
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    $20.00
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    $20.00
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  • Patriot of Pretender Contrast Coffee Mug
    Patriot of Pretender Contrast Coffee Mug - white/black
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    $15.00
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    $15.00
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  • MR Dick Baseball Cap
    MR Dick Baseball Cap - black
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    $20.00
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    $20.00
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Blog posts

Bought my husband a Trump shirt because he loved it. It was really nice when it came.I can’t believe what’s happening to our country, hopefully things can get better.

Tori N

The election they stole from us last year is the most fucked up thing I can remember seeing. How can we have a free country without free elections? I appreciate the DC Swamp Life because they actually get it. I bought a hoodie to help their cause because if they can steal our election, what the fuck is next? Keep it up guys. America needs as many Patriots as we can get

Pieter Cardon

My son in law is a decent kid, but a total moron. I call him a “millennial’s  millennial” I got him the Trump shirt for his birthday. He opened it, melted down and left it in my kitchen. Guess what I’m wearing now. Haha

C Stevens

Why did we start creating patriotic apparel?

It is simply because of the all stars below. We are tired of their nonsense. The more they try to silence us, the more desire we have to wear and show off outrageous republican and patriotic American clothing and gear

They came to D.C. dirty with desire. Days later, they were quick to sell out the American people even faster then the fake news sold us a stolen election. This was all for the glamorous, and highly contagious D.C Swamp life. The Swampies are a group of self important, hard work hating, excuse mongers who want what’s best for them, even if it means America’s downfall.

Besides that, they’re just like me and you.

How Embarrassing, these clowns make decisions on our behalf

Slow Joe Biden

Slithering in the swamp since 1973, Slow Joe entered the senate as simple minded, slow-witted slug, representing America’s smallest state.

 Slow Joe’s Senate Career was the envy of all swamp life. Confusing peers for 36 years, he bumbled by the beltway,selling hope, lying to folks, and forgetting the racist things he “misspoke.”

Slow Joe, the senate’s slow witted, simple minded slug, Became Slow Joe, the slow witted, simple minded....... Oh god, he has got her hair again!

 Like most senile Seniors, Slow Joe enjoys naps, nodding off and watching the news. Weather it is CNN or CBS, slow Joe needs his daily dose of TDS.

Shift Adam Schiff Swamp Life

Shifty Adam Schiff

Las Angeles County has cultivated countless criminals. Birthplace of the Bloods and Crips, it is crazy to consider a creature creating more chaos in California than these cowardly culprits. If you are of this opinion, let me offer up the option of a man, so sick that the seaweed seems sewn to his skeleton. Ladies and gentlemen, Southern California’s, Shifty Adam Schiff.

Shifty Schiff, a member of the “peaceful” democratic party, has spent his entire congressional career as a Warmongering serpent. Not wanting to wait for sufficient evidence, Shifty Schiff rushed the United States into War with Iraq.  Shifty Schiff’s shenanigans have sent shock waves globally. Hes upported the Saudi Arabian Intervention in Yemen, causing casualties in the tens of thousands. As despicable as this thug is for his blood thirst, Shifty Schiff is best known for having a case of Trump Derangement Syndrome that might even surpass Nasty Nancy’s.

When Shady was summoned to investigate the Russia Collusion Hoax, he proved to be untrustworthy and unstable. Without any proof to ponder, the Shifty one accused President Trump of Immoral and corrupt behavior. After his belly aching and bitching, Mueller was appointed Special Council, but to Shifty is chagrin,no evidence of collusion was found.

You would think this would be enough for Shady Adam Schiff to shut his swamp infested mouth....... but it was not. He tried to explain Mueller’s findings,or rather lack thereof, was some insane, nonsensical, legal lingo. "There may be, for example, evidence of collusion or conspiracy that is clear and convincing, but not proof beyond a reasonable doubt."

With that quote, Shifty Schiff proved his thirst for TDS will never be quenched. In the meantime, I imagine he will appease his parch with the blood from bodies he helps kill.

Nasty Nancy Pelosi

The mythologies around Nasty Nancy vary. It is not clear if she is merely the swamp’s longest tenured resident, or If she and the swamp are somehow dependent upon each other like host and parasite.

What we do know is that Nasty Nancy was conceived and cultivated in the same house she lords over. Her father was serving as a congressman the day she was born. 80 years later, Nancy's rancid aroma is permanently embedded in the walls. Like so much of the scum that infest it.

Nasty Nancy entered the swamp a monster of modest means, but she’s rotting away there today worth a slimy 100 Million. A creature lacking intelligence, grace or wit, one has to wonder why the rest of the Swamp life let Nasty Nancy speak for them. Nasty Nancy remains an enigma.

Heinous Hillary

Heinous Hillary is such a nasty, swamp entrenched creature, that her entire being reeks like a part of the body that rhymes with her nickname. Also known as Crooked Hillary Clinton, this special piece of swamp scum married Sleazeball Bill Clinton in an arrangement to further each other’s careers. There was no love, in fact, out of all the women Sleazeball Bill ever met, the only one he didn’t want to fuck was the one he married.

Heinous Hillary, a Swampie with no skills to speak of, rode her husband’s coat tails to the White House. Once there, she served as the coldest FLOTUS in the history of the United States. About 12 sex scandals and one stained dress later, Bill and Hillary left the white house in shame.

Because the swamp runs deep, Heinous Hillary was able to parlay this “resume” into a Senate Seat. Like true Swamp Scum, Crooked Hillary used her platform and senate seat to create a foundation to siphon money to foreign governments and, likely, have her political foes literally murdered. This of course, was meant to set the Clinton’s up for a second stint in the White House.

After being soundly defeated by a more charming, but somehow less credentialed competitor in 2008, Heinous Hillary decided not to take chances in 2016. Being the Swamp Monster she is, she cheated to levels never seen before. Crooked Hillary and Bill Clinton took control of the DNC and stole the nomination from Crazy Bernie Sanders. From there her campaign collude with Russia and got in bed with the fake media. When she lost anyway, Hillary accused Donald Trump of doing all things she was guilty of.

Heinous Hillary is as filthy a creature the swamp had ever seen. If Donald Trump resigned the presidency just minutes after assuming it, he still would have been among the greatest presidents of all time just for keeping the Oval Office out of the hands of this nasty women.

Maitre D' AOC

Maître D’ AOC had fully formed fungi before she stepped foot in the swamp (the result of rendezvous with restaurant regulars). Ever since she was successfully served a surprise by way of an election win, maître D’ has sunk to depths undetected by anyone before her.

However, in the swamp, reaching new lows makes you a rising star. Her assent from shot girl to swamp shot caller is easily understood when you consider her constituents. Maître D’s district encompasses all 100,000 “residents” at the rough Riker’s Island.

Who voted for these vermin’s? The same vile and vicious cons that made “tossed salad” part of your vernacular.... I am sure they are just misunderstood. Maître D’s making green new deals, pushing new green cards, and serving up fresh green cash to anybody that is not willing to work for it.

We cannot lie though, she is sexy for a swamp creature.

Will you float with us, or fall victim to the swamp

Designed, sold, and fulfilled in the U.S. of A.